I have very romanticized feelings for Gippsland etched in my reverie.
It's one of the best things that has ever happened to me. All I've learnt to love, learn to laugh and things I learn to overcome. Possibilities, impossibilities, the rights, the wrongs, the good, the not so good...
This is the time where I have gone through the greatest amount of adventure and self-discovery. Gippsland has made me see the finer things in life.
People are too caught up with the rush. I am one of them.
Before coming to Australia, I was so bent on joining Alex in the city. Complaining to my Dad about how boring Gippsland will be and why I had to be forced to take the subjects that I took. Kevin, our course coordinator, convinced me that it wasn't going to be so bad. I was skeptical once. However, Kevin didn't lie.
I remember my first impression of Gippsland. When Kai was saying, Gippsland was going to be one of the places where you will remember for life. A place you will miss. I remember I responded to him with a weird look half munching on a smoked salmon sandwich he offered.
Midway through the semester, I get it.
I finally get it now.
Exchanging to Gippsland is one of the most memorable experiences of my life.
I jot scribble and scramble.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Battle scar.
Loop Me
__________
This is every lefty's problem.
To the question that I didn't manage to answer...
I'm gonna throw rocks at you =P
CCP tmr. Not a very good time to start.
This time its done
It’ll never feel the same
But we had some good times
Guess it’s sad just the same
__________
This is every lefty's problem.
To the question that I didn't manage to answer...
I'm gonna throw rocks at you =P
CCP tmr. Not a very good time to start.
Labels:
West 35
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
On fire.
When He's near you,
You're on fire,
When He speaks,
You're on fire,
Burning at these mysteries,- Switchfoot
_____________________
WOO. One paper down. 2 more to go. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I was never good with exams.
If there was something that can make me burst into flames, it's a good thing.
ITS DAMN COLD DOWN HERE.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Not that kind of girl.
A very long time ago, someone called me a doormat. The kind you trample on after you're done with shower, pee-pee, poo-poo and what not. I haven't spoken to that person since eternity but it still bothers me till this day. Surprise, surprise, Szejia knows how to bear a grudge. (only do when I get personal attacks like this)
I would like to think of myself as an unconventional person, a closet non-conformist performing random acts of rebellion through subtle behaviours, acts and speech-In other words, this is me justifying me and my dirty-talk ;). One may find understanding me to the most purest form as a person that I am is not difficult at all.
I get a tacit agreement from all of you, I know.
I rarely keep emotional ramblings (whether happy or sad) on my blog. Normally, I only express it in a word or a sentence keeping details to myself. I assume people would never be able to decode it but since people who are close to me know I am that kind of person who can be read like a book, it's just a matter of wanting to read me or not. I try to conceal things, it comes out anyway because concealing things about myself is not something I was never good at.
And yet, unleashing my innermost thoughts injected into conversations through my sheer wit (self praise is no praise lol) and probably my very very lame brand of humour, I feel that I risked being constantly judged by what I say or do. This judgement, makes it a lot harder for me to socialize with my own persona. The fact that what I say doesn't jive into the boundaries of what I'm expected say allows people to sees me as a deviant, an 'other'. How much effort I put to try to be human is the same amount of effort I put in to carry out an act, to conform. Which I eventually get tired of and it goes poof and then I'm all exposed again.
I feel I'm constantly switching roles from one to another.
At times, I wonder if I sacrifice 'too much' in the name of humour. One of the things most humourous people find hard to deal with is the fact that they will not be taken seriously and its one of those situations that I find myself in once in a while.
Perhaps the constant snide remarks that was put across the discussion table proves the irony of the fact that that person who once labeled me that dreaded D word might actually be right. I hear alarms blaring red lights blinking. Say what? Something must be done.
I'm happy, don't misunderstand. I don't think there's anything significant other than an upcoming PMS that triggered this aching need to write this. There's only this much a person can take. I just wonder how long I can continue.
Perhaps there are other reasons to it that I can't pin point.
Perhaps there's something I can't face, something I feel that the way I am being treated is caused by with my way of interaction, non-gender conforming what not. It's my dirty talk. T.T I know it.
But still you can't deny. My talk is funny. ;P And BTW, i have just incorporated my sociology and com theories into this post. Brilliant.
OK. First exam in Aus tomorrow. Bless my soul.
I would like to think of myself as an unconventional person, a closet non-conformist performing random acts of rebellion through subtle behaviours, acts and speech-In other words, this is me justifying me and my dirty-talk ;). One may find understanding me to the most purest form as a person that I am is not difficult at all.
I get a tacit agreement from all of you, I know.
I rarely keep emotional ramblings (whether happy or sad) on my blog. Normally, I only express it in a word or a sentence keeping details to myself. I assume people would never be able to decode it but since people who are close to me know I am that kind of person who can be read like a book, it's just a matter of wanting to read me or not. I try to conceal things, it comes out anyway because concealing things about myself is not something I was never good at.
And yet, unleashing my innermost thoughts injected into conversations through my sheer wit (self praise is no praise lol) and probably my very very lame brand of humour, I feel that I risked being constantly judged by what I say or do. This judgement, makes it a lot harder for me to socialize with my own persona. The fact that what I say doesn't jive into the boundaries of what I'm expected say allows people to sees me as a deviant, an 'other'. How much effort I put to try to be human is the same amount of effort I put in to carry out an act, to conform. Which I eventually get tired of and it goes poof and then I'm all exposed again.
I feel I'm constantly switching roles from one to another.
At times, I wonder if I sacrifice 'too much' in the name of humour. One of the things most humourous people find hard to deal with is the fact that they will not be taken seriously and its one of those situations that I find myself in once in a while.
Perhaps the constant snide remarks that was put across the discussion table proves the irony of the fact that that person who once labeled me that dreaded D word might actually be right. I hear alarms blaring red lights blinking. Say what? Something must be done.
I'm happy, don't misunderstand. I don't think there's anything significant other than an upcoming PMS that triggered this aching need to write this. There's only this much a person can take. I just wonder how long I can continue.
Perhaps there are other reasons to it that I can't pin point.
Perhaps there's something I can't face, something I feel that the way I am being treated is caused by with my way of interaction, non-gender conforming what not. It's my dirty talk. T.T I know it.
But still you can't deny. My talk is funny. ;P And BTW, i have just incorporated my sociology and com theories into this post. Brilliant.
OK. First exam in Aus tomorrow. Bless my soul.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Love Me Tender.
It was a good evening when the sun had already set, me and my homies walked back from IGA to get some stuff for dinner.
Walking past the muddy road, over that miniature hill (you guys know what I'm talking about), I suddenly broke into a song. It was popularized by Elvis, covered by many many many other popular musical acts which came along even after Elvis was gone. Those acts did well, as for me, it sent my pals bubbling into laughter.
Good things get left behind. Good things live through time. Good things are eternal. Good things are remembered. :)
Walking past the muddy road, over that miniature hill (you guys know what I'm talking about), I suddenly broke into a song. It was popularized by Elvis, covered by many many many other popular musical acts which came along even after Elvis was gone. Those acts did well, as for me, it sent my pals bubbling into laughter.
Good things get left behind. Good things live through time. Good things are eternal. Good things are remembered. :)
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Sunday, June 14, 2009
힘든.
In the midst of the holiday I've been hunting around for a new home to move in to. We will be homeless in 2 weeks time. Thankfully for my aunt, I found a nice place in Armadale. Now the problem is, if the house owner rejects me then we're back out on the streets.
Family heading back home today :(
Family heading back home today :(
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Have a quickie.
Ok. So first things first, I met my family, and some new relatives who migrated to Melbourne which included-- an aunt (Aihua) whom I last saw when I was 7 (EEE, her dog is more than cuteness), an Architect cousin, David, who I supposedly came to my house in Malaysia a few years back but I don't really recall, another family Uncle Jin and Aunt Amy who brought us to Dande for scones and Devonshire tea, and their son, my cousin whom I didn't know I have, Shawn- I was double his age, and he was more eloquent in speaking which made me go 'lolwitty'- who taught me Retardendo didn't mean retard. Don't french me lar.
Coming to this side of the earth, I am happy to come and discover these relations listen to interesting stories and such.
Next.
I am supposed to be back in Gippsland now. There were a change of plans when i was talking to my parents on the phone on the way to the city in Jem's car which somehow led to me joining them till the end of their stay.
I went to Phillip Island (more penguins came this time, Koala Conserve had Wallabies too, pet a sheep, fed kangaroos omg XD) for the nth time lol love it and to Great Ocean Road (cold like dog). Plans for Dande and Ballarat on thurs and fri-it's insane.
Next.
Internet costs in Hotels are a rip off. Here I am paying 10 bucks to use it for 4 hours for my final essay. omg *puke blood* Blood puked for both $ and untimely essay datelines.
Exam on 22nd. WOOOOOOOOOOO.
*pukes more blood*
When I return. I know I'm in for it.
Coming to this side of the earth, I am happy to come and discover these relations listen to interesting stories and such.
Next.
I am supposed to be back in Gippsland now. There were a change of plans when i was talking to my parents on the phone on the way to the city in Jem's car which somehow led to me joining them till the end of their stay.
I went to Phillip Island (more penguins came this time, Koala Conserve had Wallabies too, pet a sheep, fed kangaroos omg XD) for the nth time lol love it and to Great Ocean Road (cold like dog). Plans for Dande and Ballarat on thurs and fri-it's insane.
Next.
Internet costs in Hotels are a rip off. Here I am paying 10 bucks to use it for 4 hours for my final essay. omg *puke blood* Blood puked for both $ and untimely essay datelines.
Exam on 22nd. WOOOOOOOOOOO.
*pukes more blood*
When I return. I know I'm in for it.
Friday, June 05, 2009
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