To people I love.

In pursuit of different aims in life. Different fields and interests but one motive in common: the future. Though we are apart, we dealt with distance knowing that we would meet up again someday. For eons I thought of going back to Melbourne: put it simple a good stressful getaway. I thought: I don't want to study and nobody would possibly employ me. Then I thought of how I would adapt, and I thought some more about how I would live, thought even longer how I would part.

Gippsland is not boring.

The first one to graduate.

The graduate's kick-ass uncle.

A year with best friend.

Unhealthy indulgence.


Equally unhealthy.

My canadian tutor I had a crush on.

Second most unhealthy indulgence.

Now that I different aim, I think again. Because to me I know this aim would take more than just my emotional investment to achieve. It takes a lot of balls too.

Perhaps the way I romanticize my final year in Melbourne disallows for closure. I know someday I want to return, it's just that: I wouldn't know what for.


*

People say I'm far-sighted. But the thickness of my glasses says otherwise =D

Walking Advertisement.

With no offence to Monash Malaysia (and the fact that they're the ones making me 30 bucks richer by employing me as a student helper yesterday during the open day), I found it difficult to wholeheartedly promote 'journalism' as a major because of a pretty obvious lacking.

I was in charge of the Journalism Lab with another girl. We both feel the pride in arts, we were really keen to watch the gleaming eyes of the unsuspecting 'victim' of Freud and Foucault. LOL. There were a couple, which was good. BUT Of course, there's also a couple of kids who were skeptical about the Arts. They take a peek in the room and don't even step in to hear what we have to say. Some families who leave halfway during the session and well, is Arts really at the bottom of the heap? For those who weren't interested, we still promoted our cool subjects as an elective. Come try our subjects and die and see if you think it's 'easy'. nyehehe.

On my part, I thought it was difficult to promote something that someone had a vague idea on. So half way through everything I say seemed scripted and insincere or I run out of things to say... Bleah. I liked watching those kids go gawk excitedly at what we do though. And some parents who were impressed with what we learnt. There was one mother and another family who was very accommodating. Eee. Nice people DO exist!

But it was at lunch, when I randomly met a peer who suddenly brought up the topic about Gippsland, with a look almost close to 'dread' on his face, which I have to admit, I had before going to Gippsland. Munching my food half way I thought to myself. "omg what are you talking about! Gippsland is awesome!" and whatever I enthused after that literally gave me a body lift, if not my body at least the corners of my mouth. In a split second, I become a walking Gippy advertisement. Gippsland should pay me. :)

I miss Gippsland still. The long vline train rides and the scenery. Unlike the Melbourne city or Malaysia, I left Gippsland wondering when I will come back. Because of it so far off and once the people I've got to know has left, will I ever have a reason to return to the little cow country town of Churchill?

It says it all.

This is where I catch the trains I miss.

The End.

Yay.

And so I survived the day. Lazily. Hehe. But still productive. Totally missed out on packing I don't know how to continue. Definitely didn't miss out on the proposal I was supposed to work on. Yes. I don't care what you say. I am going to write on Pixars even if it kills me for my Honours dissertation.

Yes. Decision's been made. I will return home to do a 4th year. I thought about it over and over again. I can't see myself doing anything else. Of course the decision wasn't made solely on my own. =) Which makes me feel that perhaps, making a decision solely on your own asking what YOU want will only have you stuck. It's just impossible to ignore the people around you.

It only hit me I am less than a month away from a new year and less than a week to go home. I cannot believe 2009 is over. It just felt like I was rushing to get my visa approved, rushing up to KL to attend the Exchange breifing, rushing here and there. Everything is so rushed this year and now I'm in my final week, with exactly 7 days to hop on a plane home, time starts to creep. LOL.

Come now, I don't see myself returning next year. I really don't have a reason to go through the hassle going through my limited options of what to do over here, forking out the money, looking for a new place to live and tons of paperwork for this so-called happiness that I can only imagine. I know what's for me.

For good times in Melbourne, I will cherish. And the bad, I will learn. For people I want to meet again, I will. For things I want to forget, I will. For wishes I want granted, I hope it will. :)

Gippy and Melbourne will forever have a special place in my heart, romanticized in my reverie.

I want to do this. Over and over and over again.

A couple of kids rolling down the hill over the lake. =)

_______________________

It might be a little late to blog about my return to Gippsland during the semester break. But I've got to, pictures just got posted out yesterday. =) I attended Jem's graduation. Oddly, there were alot of Kids there. Lol. Some crying halfway through the ceremony. Then others yelling on purpose just to see a panic stricken look on their parent's face. It's quite funny to see.

I used to get kicks for making my parents panic (I still do it now and then sometimes - "You're gonna be a grandma!", "I ran out of money can send me some??"), so i know where they come from. For them, it lasts forever because the best part is, they don't get spanked. But for me, I deal with a set of stereotypical Asian parents who:

1. Will not hesitate to spank/scold/yell at me if I did something grave.
2. Who expects me to find a nice chinese boy, and not a blond watery eyed heartthrob.
3. Always asks me to budget. Which I do try, but still blow it anyway. :(

But I guess parents all have one thing in common. They have this second layer which only we as kids can see. =)

***

The world's coolest uncle in history.

The world's biggest nature+people lover Photographer. HEHEHEE.

The most bipolar girl in the world.

Ok. Now not so bipolar.

Bipolar again! woohoo! (nahh it's just picture arrangements)

Indebted to their goodwill. Jem and his parents who let me hitch a ride back to the city (and around Gippsland, back from verve, to dinner omgzomg) on their way back to the airport.

CHEESEEE (ok this shouldn't be here but hell) at Wild dogs winery, Warragul. Triple cream cheese.

________________________

In my head I've always had this perception of people that if I gone back, things will be better, I'll get along better and really enjoy myself during my rather 'unlucky' second semester. I know now, it's not necessarily the case.

After returning from the country side, I know that for every Vline train that passes Armadale and Caulfield, that urge for me to hop on hasn't gone away. It is not the place that I miss but the word 'Gippsland' is a referent to the company I gained and loved over there which resounds every time I am reminded of grassy plains along the mountains and low grounds.

Towering buildings arching over every corner can be daunting. I remember standing in the junction of Swantston and La Trobe looking up at Melbourne Central and the state library during my little CBD hide-and-seek thinking to myself "Where in the world are they? Who do I look for help? I have friends staying in QV and Verve. Why don't I buzz their unit? They can help me call them. But what are their unit numbers? Been there ten thousand times, how could I not remember."

The irony here is that, can one feel lonelier in such a crowded space and feel so entertained in a land where there are more cows than people? =)

Time I've spent in the City hasn't been all downs either. I've never been to the movies alone. I don't study alone. Then we call for pizza and binge in the midst of the stress. Have ice cream in the cold. Picked up Guitar Hero. Went for prom ON A BOAT! Times when I'm ever alone in the city is often by choice or either because I got lost or somebody overslept. LOL.

And now that my stay is nearing an end, it's high-time I try to push my thoughts away from my 172 dollar fine, things that changed, looming clouds of separation from people I just got to know, and my overzealous, uber-talkative JRN classmates. Those are merely, silver-linings to my cloud. There's more to it than what I believe. I came here planning to experience the two sides of Australia. So now I have. =)

To the people that I've met in Gippsland and Melbourne and also people who have stuck through my ordeal, I really can't say this enough. Thank you. You have my love for eternity.

Churchill.

Feeling the love.

St Kilda Beach.

MART Scrambled Eggs! =)

The pier.

Cold beer on a sunny day. Zeming finished hers way faster than I did. Gippsland made her Alco.

So, my cousin asks...

sze kai says:
are u at class
how is your assignment?

Gnaww. How thoughtful. :)

.
.
.
.

I hope he never finds out, the one who's been nagging at him to do his work and taught him spelling, the one's who's been reprimanding him for being a naughty brat when he whines about body pains/flu to skip school, skipped class to finish unfinished business and get marks deducted for submitting late.

Now, how do I respond?

SALVADOR DALI.

My favourite part of the Dali's exhibition.

Destino - Disney/Salvador Dalì en Yahoo! Video

Cleverly twined with his art, Dali works with Walt Disney to come up with this short that is a series of the artworks he produced. Fusing Freud's psychoanalysis with other philosophies of sciences, the drawings (plus photos and gems) he produces are really really one of the kind.

I'm not an art critic. But as you walk through the Melbourne Gallery seeing paintings arranged from 1920's to the 1950's. It gets better and better.

:)

I feel oddly inspired these few days.

Things are clearer to me now than ever before.

I finally know how it's like to let go of things that are beyond my control. Simply because, it's not the worst thing that can ever happen to me. At the end of the day, I'm not all alone after all.

Like the exhibition, it's just the things I choose to see.

Thx.

Credits: Soni's phone. Kena tag on FB. *digholeandhides*

Ok. Door opened.

We're out.

Door.

I believe in life when one door closes, another will open. But what is actually happening now is the walls are closing on me and in this very room, there is one door that refuses to freaking open.

Both literally and metaphorically.

Emotionally, I'm incredibly incapable. It's true. I'm starting to cave in. There's no food supplies and I'm hungree.

.
.
.



*can somebody pop by Armadale and rescue us? We're locked up in our apartment. Bring pizza. You will be handsomely rewarded.

I left some great things at home.

Random stranger who butted in my pic-Aussies are very friendly. lol.

I left good friends and great people, mum, dad, bro, my cousins and gran. I left lecturers and the comm lab where we all squeeze in for our lectures. I left the one who taught me valuable lessons about Foucault, Shelley, film-making, politics, and punctuality. I left a great deal of things. left I left people who makes me feel like a child again. I left my favourite foods and my favourite tv programs.

I left intimate things at home only to come to this new surrounding which is both alien and captivating at the same time. I saw difference, unacceptence, No. Say diversity. I saw things I never would've encountered without stepping out of my little shell. I love watching this new chapter of my life unfold.

There were times I found it hard to relate to people. And I still do. With every shrug I saw and plastic expressions I got, with every mistake I made, being misunderstood, I feel a sting. Still, I love the fact that it won't kill.



I live in a beautiful house, with wonderful people to meet, had emergencies and hype, generous hot chocolate to accompany me during the coldest (and assignment-ridden) spells and cook outs everyday, I meet people from around the world and sat at Fed Square at 9 at night in the cold without extra clothes except a jumper... (Jun is crazy).

I love to see people staring at me blankly when I add a 'la' or 'hantam' in my sentence. I love the moments I had surfing at 20 degrees at Phillip Island, I love the feeling of getting lost while taking a walk, I love it when I force myself to look at strangers in the eye to ask directions, I love the great sense of achievement that swells inside me when I reach my destination the second time, I love hitchhiking off a farm truck when I miss the last bus (this is one of the things that only Gippsland will have). Good or bad, I love it all.

I left what I thought would've been and I gained what I thought I'd never find.

I'll show it to you because it took me a great chunk of me to be here as I am today.

Days of our lives in Gippyland.

Once upon a time in a land far far away (from Melbourne at least), I came to a little town called Churchill-- accompanied by Karina (master chef extraordinaire) and Joyce (chii-sin-sot-sot-lololol). There, we met a compulsive Nuttella addict (Zeming) and a giggly-omgicantstoplaughinglolololol-person (Mei Yii)--There are other interesting people that will be appearing along the way in this blogpost--and we formed a bond that they would cherish forever.

So, together... we conspire to take over the world do stuff to keep ourselves occupied at times we don't need to attend class. Contrary to popular belief, life can still be great fun without a mall in walking distance.

We take turns to cook.

Therefore we eat... YUM.

and Sleep.

My room. :)

My covers. :P

We Party!!

All dressed up.

Flouro Party!

And other parties like that at school. :)


We celebrate birthdays!

Happy b-day, Joyce!

More birthdays...

Andrew Chu's (center far back) 24th at west 27.

Me and Mrs. Chu: Random at Seven.

I tell you we celebrate hell a lot of birthdays.

Najib's 2Xth...? Old poke.

And of course, on the way home from class, We spot cars. Apparently my name is very popular with Australian number plates.

Same carpark. I'm famous.

Every Tuesday and Thursday, we play badminton.

Random pic Kari took when we were resting.

On other days, we waste time shopping for food at Morwell or IGA nearby.

And one time, MUGSU organized a surfing trip to Phillip Island (which made me feel like I broke all my bones the next morning).

Getting ready :)

Hitting the waters! :)

Pam and moi

We joined anything with free food/beer/luckydraw/formal.

We attended the Flag Dinner, which is an annual event held every first semester in Gippsland. We ate good food, good entertainment, mingled much and practice our photography...

Flag Dinner :)

And more pictures...

L-R: Mei Yii, Kai, Pamela, moi, Karina, Zeming.

L-R: (top) Ching Yee, Karina, moi, George (bottom) Mei Yii, Joyce and Cody.

Gippsland also taught us how to be narcissistic.

Don't look like it's stopping soon.

And after the event was over, we didn't want the balloons to go to waste. So we inhale helium.

and morph into a chipmunk.
We don't get labeled weird for nothing. :D

and I try to steal the limelight.

HElium is the NEW CRACK!

On some evenings we take walks and enjoy the breeze...

Tree climber Zeming.

Us at a nearby playground we discovered.

Me being a kid again!

and then when we had enough of cold wind, we head back to the our home where it's warm.

Eels Hole Creek.

And when we're home. We model for Mei Yii's photo assignment. :D

And hopefully she gets a HD for this subject coz we're pros!

And we live happily ever after :)

[The End]

Envy me. ;)