Homeward bound.

Someone's coming homeward boundddd! YAY-ness.

How in the world did two sems just passed by like that. LOL. A bit regretful for not finishing up earlier, drats. BUT WILL MAKE TIME. Hoit! Peace out!

:)

KAKI.

KAKI, in Malay means leg. And then, it's also used to describe inadequacy (Kaki bangku - Leg-of-a-Stool, rationalized as Stiff legs and inability to play balls... I mean ball games). Then it can also be used to describe 'addiction' (Kaki Judi, Kaki Botol, Kaki Bola - Kaki Botol). But all in all, regardless of whether our proficiency in Malay, it is also (most commonly known and) colloquially used to describe a chum, buddy or a really close friend. Can sometime be used like this:

"My Badminton kaki-"
"My uni kaki-"
"My clubbing kaki-"
"My mamak kaki-"

I just like to illustrate how the word referenced to a body part is so versatile in the Malay Language. And the very-malaysian flavour it exudes.

One reason why they use Kaki to describe a friend I think is synonymous to the body part, your leg, which is integral to your movement. You run, you walk, you trip over it. You stand up, you jump up, climb trees, you reach incredible heights with it. You scrape your knee, you sprain your ankle, but it heals, scars may stay but the pain does not lasts forever. Your mobility depends on your legs. Being able to be mobile, being able to do things, jump, hope, dance, cycle, drive... without my kaki, I imagine my life to be very different. (PLEASE NOTE)

Quite lonely la har? :)

So you see, one of my kaki-s that I've known for the longest time is celebrating her birthday today. But I am unable to be there with her. And she is celebrating it a little later because she has got work and exams coming right up. Being an October baby myself (4 days apart yo), I emphatise. She has been there for good and for worse, every step of the way. Even when we are apart, her presence is never lost. Phone calls, random text messages, tweets, skype karaoke (?!!) and all.

BAHAHA. :D

Being apart hasn't always been the easiest for us but for all we've learnt and for all the good times we had spent together for like... the past ten thousand years, you know me inside out, see me at my best, seen me at my worst but still stuck on like any kaki would. For my inadequacies I apologize. I may not have always been like how you have been to me, but through it all I hope there were things I did right.

Shrek! Albert Ling sesat. LOL.

Thank you for your thoughtfulness, for your support, kind advices and listening ear. All in all, thank you for the friendship and love.

Paiseh lah so cheesy.

Happy 22nd Birthday Kanina! :D BAHAHAHA.

Karina Ng Li Chean is the best kaki in the world! aka currypau, currypuff, japanese curry, maggi curry, all things yummy.

Don't kill me.

Award winning concept.

Award winning smiles. :)

Happy Birthday!

Loves,

Booger. (still don't know how you came up with this =.=)

Salam Merdeka.

Dear Malaysia,

I thought about you a lot when I was away.
I thought about what you offered and what you had that I didn't at where I stood.
I stood at dark cobalt stone alleys dipping my boot into dew.
The chill engulfed me with the wind and yet the sun was shining.
I hopped off from tram to tram.
I rushed from train to train.
This life was one I technically could live with.
With facilities to make sure my comfort,
and meals to make sure I would eat.
But what was there that made me feel incomplete?

I love you too much to watch you crumble.
I wished I loved you enough to hold you so you wouldn't.
Would I be too docile to conform?
Or would I be too antagonistic to react?
Would I be too selfish to wait for someone else to keep you intact?
How should I declare my love for you?
However I do it others won't approve.

And like unrequited love, here I am. Living in limbo of the worst kind.

With Love,

Your Citizen.

Happy Birthday.

This came late.

My coursemates. Jacqui far left followed by Natasha, Neneng, Belinda and Marina. Jacqui and Marina happened to be the first few people I spoke to during my first few days in Monash in orientation. X)

Joyce, the person who could balance up the atmosphere with some gilarness, Gippy people with fellow Zeming, Myii, Alva, Andrew and Kanina always up to some thing at the south houses. LOL. Much loves. Awesome company.

Not your average lecturer monash father-figure Dr. Yeoh, someone to look up to and know that I am in good hands.

Alex, the buddy who keeps my feet very firmly to the ground when I'm hovering up there somewhere and made difficult times easier. The one who came when many couldn't to hand me my graduation bear. Thankew. =)

My family, Dad, mum and Sze Wei, the ones who made this all possible. Thank you for your love and support and believing in me when I chose this path.

A non sequitur.

My chancelor looks like Dr. House.

To people who couldn't make it, it doesn't make me love you all any less. HAHA. =)

Graduation.

I don't FEEEEEEL like a Monash graduate.

Can't get anymore personal than that.

You remember those role-playing games you play. You roll up an A4 paper and tie it with a ribbon, tie a blanket around your neck like a cape/robe. No hat but it doesn't matter. You make your walk up the stairs and proud and all, mimicking what you see on the Brands' essense of Chicken or Milo adverts. LOL.

Those were the kind of ads that romanticised the whole 'mother' tears when child graduates thing. But I don't FEEEEEEL it. Don't get me wrong, my parents are proud of me and all that. But I don't feel like this is, as far as it goes, the proudest moment of my life. That this is actually the start of something that I potentially might like, but still have no clue of.

I know part of the reason why my graduation didn't seem like anything at all I expected as a kid, is because I have class at 9.00am today. X( BOOO @ Timing. LOL. But after catching up with my friends for a while, I realized there a number of them who are already working, and a number of those who are looking for work.

I wonder, what does it feel like to be them?

For me, the ceremony yesterday felt a lot more 'real'. Of course we can question 'realness', like it's happening, at this moment, at this very second I get 5 seconds on stage to take a piece of paper I worked hard for.

As soon as took off my robe, it's symbolic in a sense that, I'm no longer an undergrad student. I'm being thrust into this whole of set of responsibilities (which I actually 'failed' to fulfill today bummer).

It's like. No more running around the house naked or in a robe with a rolled up A4 paper in your hand. You gotta get out there. And be a somebody. Not just a graduate.

Random Blog Material.

Happy CNY people. (And V day. FEEL THE LOVE.)

Oy Bull.

Omg. Omg. Omg. Reunion Dinner on Sat.

Remembered I need to hand in book list ASAP before CNY. WAHLAOS. *emohs*

SUPERVISOR BALIK KAMPUNG DY LA HOWW?!

*panic*

*edit: Got a reply. workaholic. - Feb 12*

All because I was

1. Busy looking for a place to stay.
2. Procrastinating.
3. Trying to finish Brilliant Legacy (2009) and Minamishineyo (2009).
4. Singapore-ing and Procrastinating even more.
5. CNY-ing
6. Baking.
7. Thinking about everything else but my thesis. lol.

I don't believe I run on a Pentium two up there but I admit. I question my brain capacity sometimes. Why oh why am I not blessed with the incredible ability to multitask and hence more on-my-toes-abit, less up-in-the-sky-somewhere.

That aside.

I DON'T FIT IN ANY OF THE CLOTHES I BOUGHT FOR NEW YEAR THIS YEAR. GARGHHH. EVERYTHING I PUT ON GIVES ME A MUFFIN TOP.

Yes, I am going to start on a CNY rant now on the eve of New Year's eve.

Every year, we go through this. And who are we kidding? There are somethings about family gatherings that pricks us once in a while. But hey, don't get me wrong. It doesn't mean I love them any less. There's just a handful. It's especially problematic for really BIG families, huge extended ones.

So, since it's 2am and I've just found 4 books to add on my book list, I am going to come out with a list of awkward CNY situations that I'm sure people can relate to. Some I speak from experience, some coz I'm observant. Heh.

Topic 1: Your weight.

Yeap. Everybody's got relatives who do that. For girls, this is possibly the most dreaded topic to ever bring up when everyone is gathered around yummy food during the reunion dinner. It's one of those topics that really kills your appetite. Even worse, if you were the one who prepared the meal.

Sure, you've had a stressful year, snacked abit in between, had a baby perhaps?, had no time for the gym or no money to sign up for one, or just plain lazy to work out because it didn't occur to you how fast a year past after someone says to you "Wah, you putting on weight ah," while you were chomping on your abalone/cookies/bakkwa halfway. Or maybe you're just naturally the way you are no matter how much you workout/eat. [This applies to petite people too, but they get the opposite 'Must eat more treatment']. And the worst, it just didn't occur to you it was going to happen again the next year if you didn't do anything about it.

This year. You meet. Something changed. Your waistline. She mentions it again. At the dinner table. All your other relatives are around. She just put you through something even worst than public execution. LOL. Your appetite gets killed so does every other organ in your body. You remind yourself to change and swallow the last bit of bakkwa and vow upon the very day itself that you will be a changed person. Some people succeed. Some people just turn to the cookies after someone offers them and the cycle repeats all over again.



Topic 2: Their kids.

In a typical Chinese family setting, I am not generalizing but all Chinese parents really do this, parents love to talk about how great their kids are. Often out of love really =) and among parents, it's the only topic in common they have to discuss about after they're done gossiping about the government/share markets/business/other relatives. Except, some parents happen to sell their children a little too well like they're a mass-produced product sold on TV it makes you feel really icky on a joyous day. But hey don't be. Just remember your parents will be selling you as well. As you grow older, you will start to realize that perfect picture painted is really just, well... a picture (one thing I learnt in my course, communicating is just a matter of perceiving. Everything that is communicated is framed in such away that tells a story for the person's perspective Nothing is the gospel truth) and how pointless it'll be to be affected by something really trivial. =)


Topic 3: Your future.

SPM leavers/Uni-graduates/Retrenched get this quite often. For people who know what to do in your life, this is the time to shine. Outdo, outwit and outlast that kaypoh relative who dissed you for not having that straight A's/scholarship/promotion that they expected you to get. You explain your plans is great-detail with great passion sparkling in your eyes.

For people who don't know what they are doing yet, the case is often harder to deal with. Especially if your relative just listed out his/her/their children's plans, it's even harder to prevent your pride from being trashed. It can be really demoralizing especially with the fakeness of the whole conversation, "Oh you'll find something to do soon" or "Do you want to work for random-business-tycoon-relative-i-know". It's already weird enough you only meet this person once a year, pretty obvious you don't feel particularly close or sometimes any connection at all to that relative.

Remember words can travel. If your family happen to be the gossipy kind, tell a white lie. "I'm thinking of..." blablabla. Just be really down to earth about it. Anything but I dunno because they'll automatically think you're bumming.

Topic 4: Your Lovelife.

Whether you're single or taken or is your marriage going well random things that you really rather not talk about. It normally starts once you hit your early 20's. By 30 it gets tiring. If they live long enough by 40, you've move on. By 50... Hm. Either way, conforming to societal pressures rarely work out. I personally think it not worth sacrificing your own happiness to gain approval from others.

Remember this is only just to create small talk. Somethings that are said, really don't matter enough to be taken seriously. Spare the grudge. Spread the love. Be tactful. Avoid touching on too sensitive issues. If they do things to tick you off just be polite to remind them about your boundaries.

It's comfort you find in your family. Not competition. Those who can't provide simply don't mean as much. =)

My university degree life,

No more essays.

No more exams.

No more class tests.

No more random presentations. Or planned ones even.

Three Years

Is officially over.

YAY. =)

HEY HO.

Thanks for all the well wishes. The support in my ordeal. To all the lecturers, whether you were accommodating or anal, thank you all that you have taught me, whether academically or life that you all have been very significant to what I am today. You are all in a way or another an inspiration to me.

Chin Huat, I've ultimate respect for what you stand for. Dr Yeoh, I admire your wit and humour in providing this toolbox to carry in life. To all other lecturers who made everything implicit apparent, I will never forget you.

To Sonia, I am damn glad you are here to witness this little end of yet another chapter of our lives. It only seemed like it was yesterday we finished High School and now that we look back, the irony is it has been a while since.

To friends who I've met along to way, I value your friendships and support. Hearts hearts. *blows kisses all around the world*

My Second Media Age subject taught me that, I don't need to be an Oscar award winner to give thank you speeches.

HELLO BOOZE THE BEACH AND THE SAND!

I could write an essay.

Yeh I could write a full length essay about you but I refuse to be corny. Heh. Heh.

Happy 21st Birthday Karina. =)

1. It's been awesome having you around.
2. You're irreplaceable.
3. Alex and I had a great time planning. Hope you liked what we did. =)
4. Old already, cannot be blur ha.
5. The day we won't be friends anymore is the day that Michael Jackson comes back to life... Nah. I take that back, just in case he does.
6. For all the times you stood by mee, for all the truth that you made me see, for all the joy you brought into my life, for all the wrong that you made rightttt~

OH SHIT. DAMN CORNY.

OK. Back to work.

Sekian,

People.

나도 사랑해.

Twenty-one.

So this is it. One foot set into adulthood. Ready to conquer what's about to come. As a kid, I always thought whatever that constituted to an adult just came naturally. How they look, how they wear, how the speak, how the wield their authority... But despite that, when I look into the mirror and still feel like a kid. It hard to believe, I've grown one year older, into a new phase in life. =)

But I know for sure, when I wake up tomorrow, When I wake up everyday in years to come, I have what I wished for. =)

Thank you everybody this very special day.

Although I didn't celebrate my 21st birthday the traditional way by getting smashed or wasted... (I'll postpone that till all my study commitments are over ;D), I had a really pleasant surprise that will keep me smiling for the rest of the year.

By now, I've sent out my thank yous personally already to people in Melbourne, Gippsland (YAY GIPPY), and back home! I'm feeling the love from many parts of the world.



Sometimes it's hard to see things you already have when you focus too much on expectations. It's also a lot harder to forget things that you never expect. <3

Forget, 172. You guys make me feel like a million bucks.

Happy Moo Year. :)

Hope everybody had a great Lunar New Year. May the year bring love, good health, good luck, more money and good grades!