The rarity.

There a time in a significant moment of youth, like a sort of coming of age, when people part, and one suddenly feels a sense of loss looking back at the old times spent together. Paths that cross part one by one, sharing only one thing in common that is the time of passing. It becomes harder to let go, harder to move on. The only reason is because people like this are rare.

When you lose their physical presence, one can only wonder what sort of lives they're currently living. When calls suddenly aren't enough. When your life takes a crucial turn, such loss you feel the people who was there weren't anymore. That you want these people to live through the significant moments of your life, which in turn you also hope to live in theirs.

These people are rare.

I can only wonder what I've missed in theirs. Does it feel the same for them?

Rectify.

alexyeo says:
yup
rmb
u still got time to rectify watever regrets u might have in the future
u dont want that day to come
so start

A blessing.

It's not that hard to see.

Timeless.

Back in the day when I was into a language I could barely understand and elaborate live performances to download. I still love this song.

Ingest.

Things I've been putting off since forever.

Omgosh help me.

Sanity.

It has been a week. A week with enough bombshells to make me Nagasaki. Thank you, bomb shelter.

With all that has happened, the shock, the tears, and the lessons, I can't help but feel blessed that I was able to live through this. And one week on, we still miss him. But to know that he would be laid to rest is comforting. Even more so, that he's being laid to rest on this same land I currently step on.

The whole idea of death and how vulnerable the living is still scares me but it's one lesson that I'll never forget. Ben, you left in style. Thank you. We'll never forget you.

I spoke to a Karina on the phone yesterday had an awesome laugh. I don't remember the last time we spoke on the phone for that long la. I may not be there with you right now, but I'm there in spirit. Ok? Alex, apparently Melbourne misses us. A little shout out to everybody we loved in Melbie. Alo!

Looking back at what happened after Chiang Mai is still bizarre. But what can I say? I still can't rationalize a whole lot of other things that happened before Chiang Mai.

Conducted a tutorial last Friday. Reminded me of a particular tutorial I had with Ben on a Friday when I was in first year.

Thank You.

Thank you for all the lessons in class and of life and all you gave.

Thank you for ushering love into my life.

Thank you for the Short film that I've been bugging you for.

Thank you for this one last lesson you taught us about how short life is now that you're gone. But memories of you will be immortalized in time.

Though it's too late for me to thank you in person, I think you know.

I will comfort myself. I know that you're in a better place.

We love you Ben. You will be missed.

End.

Semester one is down, semester two is staring at my face. I'm currently sitting down chilling with my parents in a hotel room they are spending the night in. I think since Karina's arrival at KL and Chiang Mai, this has been the only time I got to sit down to rest and stone. Been busy busy busy, rushing, hanging out, juggling work. It's all good times I want to remember.

Of course, I won't get to do this for long, because there are things to do. Uni starts tomorrow at 9am. Workload is doubling in front of my eyes. Commitments as well.

But I know these are things I WANT to commit myself to. Whether it's Honours or the possibility of messing up as a tutor, or that special someone I hope I won't neglect. These commitments are choices I made, as well as promises. I'd do my best to finish what has begun.

Perhaps I've been too accustomed what we had in Chiang Mai. I was unsure of what to expect at first, could it be a summer fling? or would feelings change once the Chiang Mai heat stops messing with our judgments? Though In search of Chiangmai may be over, but I'm glad to know that some things don't really end even when it's over. Among the other things I found in Chiang Mai, I'm glad I found you. I still don't know how it happened but I've never been happier.

*

I'm finally Home. You know what I mean.

Cheers to Cheesiness!

MSN

MSN doesn't do me justice. Seven Chat boxes with my mother beside me can only equal to mental chaos.

Stars shining right above me.

Dreamt a little dream of us.

So.

The Streets were Rowdy! And the octopus was correct. Somehow, the streets that night reminded me of Melbourne during one of those hot-spells. It has been eventful. :) For more, please check (shameless advertising here lol) THIS.

Chiang Mai, this quaint little city up north of Thailand yet so rich with culture, has a special place in my heart.

Interpretations.

Spreading wongfu love.

*

Excited. Chiangmai in 8 hours. I hope I get a window seat. =)

I don't need an elaborate ruse.

To pay attention to things. Despite having a really short attention span. :)

What I hear no one else has to know.

I haven't been having exactly the easiest time of my life, but I have had people help me lighten up my burden.

I know parting is inevitable. And having to part after High School is even harder to maintain. I know presence is important, but online one can never really know. It gets harder and harder to maintain a conversation over the years with late replies and cracking our minds for topics and different thoughts and opinions change in general because we've all moved on to different phases in life. I think I made someone very upset last night. I can only hope it's not for too long.

It's been a decade. Definitely didn't feel like one. I'll see you people back home.

The car park song.

I've seen.

Theee claawwww - My best purchase from Singapore.

People around me fall in and out of relationships. Those who don't, remain in a rocky one or hold on to hope to be part of a relationship that never really became. I used to wonder why don't they see themselves deserving someone better? I used to think people are to just jump into a relationship for all the wrong reasons were silly for doing so. But even so, who is to say the reason is right or wrong?

I now know you cannot rationalize it this way. Feelings can be there. It's only worrisome that sometimes they don't last long enough. When they don't, things fall apart and slowly (but surely) people learn, rebuild their lives, stand up on their feet again until the next one comes by and the cycle of uncertainty continues.

Most people are strong enough to live through this learning cycle.

I still can't picture myself going through something like this, but maybe in time I will.

I feel young today.

Reggae.

I'll never be the same, if we ever meet again. - Katy Perry.


I've been to Petaling Street area for the first time in my life. And I wonder, why no one brought me here before. This is me, and the midnight dodginess of Kuala Lumpur. It's quite a social experience. It's not as dodgy as I thought. Anywhere's good with good company.

The house is empty.

Food for thought: A house is not a home. Home is not always in a house.